Muffin

[rain]

Whilst delicately sampling the retractable nectar, Leon succumbed finally to the stampeding lockjaw which had troubled him since youth. His friends gathered in a large, hirsute group and had him soundly horsewhipped.

[bron]

Prematurely ending her terrestrial existence, Anophelia sank her proboscis deep into the crusty edge of Craig McLauchlin's hemorrhoid and took a last, heady drink.

[ejn]

The competition was fierce, but Alan gripped the taloned fritter fiercly and with rapture. He crumbled and fell hard, and the other desserts crapped themselves laughing.

[bron]

A bucket of yams in one hand and two fingers in the other, the possum felt absolutely certain she'd balanced for longer than that dickhead squirrel. Squinting into bright headlights, she suddently remembered the bay leaves.

[ejn]

Larry fondled the slapper awkwardly and his right leg fell off. Coincidentally, a large whale fell on his left index finger. As always, he was happy.

[bron]

Vying for pole position, she squeezed in a full tube of Colgate and frothed excitedly. The curtain motifs chortled with satisfaction, and waved their fleecy currency.

[ejn]

Paul turned around and vomited quietly, but happily. He was then reminded of the events of the previous night, as Eugene the tufted titmouse once again dried himself off and scampered off shieking histerically.

[ipodman]

Kate arrived at work but was descended upon and brutally shaved, luckily she was wearing her new trousers equipped with emergency merkins.

[rain]

In an embarrassing slip up, Diane's new diet was temporarily suspended whilst she enthusiastically devoured the head of the Blinganian Royal Family. Diplomatic ties became strained.

[bron]

Dancing from his invaded crack with renewed vigor, Gerald shunned the wet jelly bean and half-sucked jube, purchased two vowels and won himself an all expenses paid trip to Flowerpot.

[rain]

Tiptoeing gingerly through the corduroy pants, Helga shielded her eyes from the glaring ringpiece. She began to feel an unaccustomed sense of melancholy. She gently hoovered her minge.

[bron]

Peering down at the final skinny pickle in her chair dance routine, Audrey retrieved it, painted it pink and named it Willy. They became cribbage champions.

[ejn]

The grogan of life represented all that Marcus had ever strived for. Aroused and fervent, he gently ran his hands sensually along its length before devouring it angrily and with melancholy.

[rain]

Striving eagerly to regain her nether regions from the dizzying altitude, Olive for the very first time gained a startling insight into the mind of the three toed sloth. She never reached her goal.

[ejn]

Barry was liberal with his churlish praise. As the custard dribbled down Percy the pet possum's muzzle, he lavishly swore under his breath with glee and angst.