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Posted: Mon Oct 27, 2003 12:52 pm
by rain
Like a small, furry muffin, Fidel coughed into his umbrella. We giggled like schoolgirls and set upon him with frozen cod ...

The Texas Strawberry

Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2003 5:56 pm
by ejn
When next you are ballooning over Texas, beware the masked, flying strawberry - its poison bite is lethal.

Turnip squashing

Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2003 5:59 pm
by rain
If you ever need to squash a turnip, please pull over to the side of the road, and use any excess luggage as ballast


Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2003 6:01 pm
by ejn
Straining against the wind, Shelley the small dollup of pus finally gave up and called shotgun - she got to ride up front next to the Ya Pear

The Euro

Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2003 6:06 pm
by rain
Seldom seen due to its robust whimsy, the Euro dollar is at its most breathtaking in the underpants of a small trained monkey

Fed up

Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2003 6:07 pm
by ejn
Gerald the give way sign, tired and fed up, accidentally became homocidal and destroyed a small family of squirrels.


Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2003 6:09 pm
by rain
With his pants hysterically burning Melvin floundered uselessly into his largest reindeer, gasping with laughter, and generally being a tool

Womble tape

Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2003 6:09 pm
by ejn
The homeless womble turned to a life of prostitution - he was very much in demand. That was until the day Cedric turned up with duct tape...


Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2003 6:12 pm
by rain
Wearing only a small toadstool and a thin film of dignity, it became increasingly obvious to all that it was time to exhibit prize orchids


Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2003 6:16 pm
by ejn
Gertrude turned desperately to nude hang-gliding, but it wasn't enough. The tiny, bald elk just would not dislodge.


Posted: Thu Nov 27, 2003 2:18 pm
by bron
Eric wheeed excitedly as his feeble limbs flew through the air with great abandon, clutching at tassles amidst the leathery jungle of the rental sporan

Pablo does batter

Posted: Thu Nov 27, 2003 3:03 pm
by rain
Magically reappearing in the disused cake batter, Pablo decided a line had been crossed, and it was necessary to henceforth inhibit the frantically oversexed paperweight.


Posted: Thu Nov 27, 2003 10:04 pm
by ejn
Looking back on his troubled life, Cyril realised it had all started to go to shit when his oversized butt exploded in his mid-twenties.


Posted: Thu Nov 27, 2003 11:36 pm
by rain
His severed nose resting comfortably in his hand, he spun swiftly around to face his arch nemesis, the withered turnip of fury

Barry's last dance

Posted: Thu Nov 27, 2003 11:37 pm
by ejn
Being careful to look brutally down his nose at the randy seals, the flying eel rapped each of them soundly around the chops with Barry the garden snail.